wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize