In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
