it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
