she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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