Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize