There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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