there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
