'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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