your parents love me but you hate me
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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