My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Randomize
