You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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