Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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