How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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