No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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