Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
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