I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
