Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
