you would pick up someone in the library
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
