just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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