he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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