from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
smell my finger.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
