Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
