Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
