We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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