Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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