Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I can't turn off my feet"
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
How does one acquire holy water?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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