Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
