you guys were way drunker than both of me
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
