found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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