Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
