YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
