I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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