I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
