I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
