If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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