I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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