well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
