My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
