I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
