just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
