Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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