how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
