So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
