something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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