It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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