Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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