they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
