Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
