that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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