Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize
