They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
