Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize