Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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